6 Clever Strategies to Get Kids to Listen Without Raising Your Voice

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Getting kids to listen can feel downright exhausting—especially when you’re a grandma who’s been around the block a few times. You’ve raised your own children, you’ve learned a thing or two, and yet there are moments when your grandchild looks right through you like you didn’t say a word.

And honestly? That’s normal.

Between school, activities, screens, and the nonstop noise of everyday life, kids get tired of listening. By the time they’re home—or at Grandma’s house—their little brains are full. Sometimes, tuning out feels easier than paying attention.

If you’ve ever thought, “Did you hear a single word I just said?”—you’re not alone.

The same goes for parents, too. Young children often ignore the adults they feel safest with. It’s not disrespect. It’s fatigue, distraction, and a whole lot of growing up happening all at once.

The good news? There are simple, gentle ways to reconnect and get a child’s attention—without raising your voice or repeating yourself ten times. A few small changes in how you speak, approach them, or choose the moment can make a big difference.

Below are six practical, grandma-approved strategies that help children pause, look up, and actually listen—whether you’re their grandmother or their parent.

Don’t Overload Their Little Brains

If you’re a grandma, you’ve probably noticed this already: kids can only handle so much at once. When you give them a long list of instructions—
“Turn off the TV, go upstairs, change your clothes, brush your teeth, and comb your hair”—most of it goes in one ear and right out the other.

By the time you finish the sentence, they’ve already forgotten everything after the first step.

On the flip side, being too vague doesn’t work either. Saying something like, “Get ready for bed,” often means they’ll skip half the routine and somehow end up distracted again.

What works better—for grandmas and parents—is breaking things into small, bite-sized steps.

Start with just one or two simple instructions. For example:
“When your show is over, it’s time to turn off the TV and get ready for bed.”

Once the TV is off, then you move on to the next step:
“Alright, sweetheart, pajamas and brushing teeth are next. Do you want to walk or hop to the bathroom?”

Little choices like that keep kids engaged and make them feel included—without overwhelming them.

How You Say It Matters

As a grandma, you already know this: kids don’t just listen with their ears. They listen with their eyes—and sometimes with a gentle touch.

When you really want your grandchild’s attention, try getting down on their level. Make eye contact. Place your hands softly on their shoulders or give a gentle squeeze. That small moment of connection helps their busy little brain slow down and focus on what you’re saying.

Another helpful trick—one that works just as well for parents—is asking them to repeat your words back to you. Not in a strict way, but in a calm, loving tone.

For example, instead of just saying, “No snacks in the living room,” you might add,
“Can you tell Grandma where we’re allowed to eat today?”

It saves everyone frustration later—and avoids the classic, “You never told me that!” moment.

Be Direct and Get to the Point

Another thing kids are surprisingly good at? Tuning out long explanations.

If you talk around a request for too long, they’ll stop listening before you ever get to the point. A sentence like,
“We’re going to the park to meet someone and you’ll want to climb on the playground, so you probably shouldn’t wear your sandals…”
usually ends with them still standing there in sandals.

Instead, lead with the clear instruction first.

Something simple like:
“Sweetie, put on your sneakers now. We’re going to the playground.”

Short. Clear. Easy to understand.

Whether you’re a grandma trying to keep the day running smoothly or a parent juggling a hundred things at once, a calm, direct approach helps kids hear you—and actually do what you asked.

Give Them Your Full Attention

This one can be tough, for grandmas and parents alike.

You might think you’re listening while folding laundry, watching the news, or checking your phone—but kids can tell when they only have half your attention. And when they feel brushed aside, they’re less likely to listen when it’s their turn.

Not every story they tell needs a standing ovation, of course. But when they’re sharing something important—especially about their day—try to pause and really be present.

That means making eye contact, nodding, asking a question or two, and letting them finish without distractions. Cooking dinner while chatting is fine. Scrolling your phone or watching TV at the same time? Not so much.

When kids feel truly heard, they feel valued. And when they feel valued, they’re much more likely to return the favor and listen when you speak.

Whether you’re a grandma savoring time with your grandchild or a parent juggling a busy household, giving focused attention—even for a few minutes—makes a bigger difference than you might think.

Don’t Turn Into a Broken Record

If you feel like you’re repeating yourself over and over, pause.

Kids quickly learn when they don’t have to listen the first time. If they know Grandma—or Mom or Dad—will say it five more times, they’ll wait it out. Before long, your words turn into background noise.

A better approach is to say it clearly once, repeat it once if needed, and then follow through.

For instance, you might say,
“Please put your LEGO pieces in the blue bin upstairs.”

If nothing happens, calmly add,
“If the LEGOs aren’t cleaned up, they’ll be put away for the rest of the day.”

And then—this is the hard part—mean it.
No yelling. No long lectures. Just calm, loving follow-through.

On the flip side, don’t forget to notice when they listen the first time. A simple,
“Thank you for doing that right away—that helps Grandma so much,”
goes a long way.

Whether you’re a grandma enjoying precious time with your grandkids or a parent managing everyday routines, consistency and calm delivery help kids take your words seriously—and feel safe doing so.

Turn Listening Into a Little Game

If you’re a grandma, you know this feeling well: kids spend most of their day being told what to do. By the time they’re with you, their ears are tired. Sometimes, listening needs to feel a little more fun.

One simple way to help is to turn listening into a game instead of a demand.

Take a slow walk together and see what you can hear—birds chirping, bugs buzzing, the wind moving through the trees, or gravel crunching under your shoes. You can even turn it into a challenge:
“Who can hear the quietest sound?”

Music works too. Put on a kid-friendly song and talk about the words together. Ask what they think the song is about or which part they like best. It sharpens their listening skills without them even realizing it.

These little moments help kids learn how to tune in—without pressure.

At the end of the day, one of the greatest gifts a grandma can give is support—not just to her grandkids, but to their parents too. When you back Mom and Dad up, use the same gentle language, and follow the same expectations, kids feel safer and less confused.

They learn that the adults in their life are on the same team. A quiet word of encouragement to a tired parent, a calm reminder to a grandchild, or simply saying, “Let’s listen to Mom right now,” can make all the difference.

When grandmas and parents work together, everyone feels more supported—and kids learn that listening isn’t about control, it’s about connection.

Read Also: The One Phrase That Will Instantly Get Kids to Listen—Without Yelling

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